1. English for Careers Chapter 12 Polishing Your Writing

2. English for Careers: Business, Professional, and Technical, 10 th ed. Smith and Moore © 2010 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458. All Rights Reserved. 2 Your goals for Chapter 12 Write complete and correct sentences. Write clearly and concisely. Use friendly language in your writing. Use the grammar, word choices, and punctuation you practiced in Chapters 2-11.

3. English for Careers: Business, Professional, and Technical, 10 th ed. Smith and Moore © 2010 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458. All Rights Reserved. 3 Writing complete sentences Are these fragments, run-ons, commas splices, or sentences? Hoping to hear from you for your input. Fragment I hope to hear from you we need your input. Run-on

4. English for Careers: Business, Professional, and Technical, 10 th ed. Smith and Moore © 2010 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458. All Rights Reserved. 4 Fragments, run-ons, commas splices, or sentences? I hope to hear from you, we need your input. Comma Splice I hope to hear from you; we need your input. Sentence

5. English for Careers: Business, Professional, and Technical, 10 th ed. Smith and Moore © 2010 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458. All Rights Reserved. 5 To avoid a fragment: Make sure a word group has a subject, a verb, and independence. If a word group does not contain these elements, it is a fragment.

6. English for Careers: Business, Professional, and Technical, 10 th ed. Smith and Moore © 2010 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458. All Rights Reserved. 6 To avoid a run-or comma splice: Separate independent clauses with a period followed by a capital letter. Join independent clauses with a comma and coordinating conjunction.

7. English for Careers: Business, Professional, and Technical, 10 th ed. Smith and Moore © 2010 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458. All Rights Reserved. 7 Join independent clauses with a semicolon, either with or without a transitional expression following the semicolon. Make one of the independent clauses dependent.

8. English for Careers: Business, Professional, and Technical, 10 th ed. Smith and Moore © 2010 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458. All Rights Reserved. 8 Written workplace communications must be: Clear Correct Concise Courteous Logical

9. English for Careers: Business, Professional, and Technical, 10 th ed. Smith and Moore © 2010 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458. All Rights Reserved. 9 Sentence Faults Result in problems for readers Readers are amused or distracted by errors Readers have to seek clarifications Readers feel their time is wasted

10. English for Careers: Business, Professional, and Technical, 10 th ed. Smith and Moore © 2010 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458. All Rights Reserved. 10 Sentence Faults Prevent writers from achieving their objectives Miscommunications happen Frustrations mount The company looks unprofessional Business suffers

11. English for Careers: Business, Professional, and Technical, 10 th ed. Smith and Moore © 2010 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458. All Rights Reserved. 11 Sentence fault #1 – sentence length Avoid short “choppy” sentences combine them Avoid very long sentences try to keep sentences under 25-30 words Vary sentence length

12. English for Careers: Business, Professional, and Technical, 10 th ed. Smith and Moore © 2010 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458. All Rights Reserved. 12 Combine choppy sentences. Jane likes to work. Dick Likes to play. Jane likes to work, but Dick likes to play. Jane likes to work and Dick likes to play. Although Jane likes to work, Dick likes to play.

13. English for Careers: Business, Professional, and Technical, 10 th ed. Smith and Moore © 2010 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458. All Rights Reserved. 13 Combine choppy sentences. The play was long. It was boring. The actors forgot their lines. The play was long and boring, and the actors forgot their lines. The play was long and boring. In addition, the actors forgot their lines.

14. English for Careers: Business, Professional, and Technical, 10 th ed. Smith and Moore © 2010 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458. All Rights Reserved. 14 Beware of “gobbledygook” — long words and long sentences: Use short instead of long words Eliminate unnecessary words Break up long, complicated sentences Avoid pompous language

15. English for Careers: Business, Professional, and Technical, 10 th ed. Smith and Moore © 2010 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458. All Rights Reserved. 15 Clarify gobbledygook To prevent interference of respiration due to the obstruction of the larynx region, masticate sustenance with absolute thoroughness. To prevent choking, chew food thoroughly.

16. English for Careers: Business, Professional, and Technical, 10 th ed. Smith and Moore © 2010 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458. All Rights Reserved. 16 Sentence fault #2— vague pronoun references Correct pronoun references that create confusion. Joe and Ed are going in his car. (whose car?) Joe and Ed are going in Ed’s car.

17. English for Careers: Business, Professional, and Technical, 10 th ed. Smith and Moore © 2010 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458. All Rights Reserved. 17 Correct vague pronoun reference We need a trainer for the dog who speaks German. (the dog speaks German?) We need a dog trainer who speaks German.

18. English for Careers: Business, Professional, and Technical, 10 th ed. Smith and Moore © 2010 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458. All Rights Reserved. 18 Sentence fault #3— misplaced words Avoid misplaced words that create confusion (or unintended amusement) Mom has the recipe for the apple pie, which is in her head. (she has an apple pie in her head?) Mom’s apple pie recipe is in her head, not written down.

19. English for Careers: Business, Professional, and Technical, 10 th ed. Smith and Moore © 2010 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458. All Rights Reserved. 19 Correct misplaced words Joy drove her boyfriend’s car whom she has been dating for three months. (she’s dating a car?) The car Joy drove belongs to her boyfriend, whom she’s been dating for three months.

20. English for Careers: Business, Professional, and Technical, 10 th ed. Smith and Moore © 2010 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458. All Rights Reserved. 20 Sentence fault #4— inconsistent word forms Use consistent wording for a series of words or phrases (parallel parts ) Not parallel Americans have a right to live, having liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. Parallel Americans have a right to life, to liberty, and to the pursuit of happiness.

21. English for Careers: Business, Professional, and Technical, 10 th ed. Smith and Moore © 2010 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458. All Rights Reserved. 21 Sentence fault #5— the voice of verbs Choose the active or passive voice, depending on what you want to emphasize. Active The senator broke the president’s vase. Passive The vase was broken by the senator.

22. English for Careers: Business, Professional, and Technical, 10 th ed. Smith and Moore © 2010 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458. All Rights Reserved. 22 Making the choice Active (direct) The subject does the verb’s action Use active for most workplace writing Passive (indirect) The subject receives the action Use passive for tact or emphasi s

23. English for Careers: Business, Professional, and Technical, 10 th ed. Smith and Moore © 2010 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458. All Rights Reserved. 23 Are these sentences active or passive? The soloist sang the aria off-key. Active subject (soloist) did the action (sang) The aria was sung off-key. Passive aria was sung “by someone” off-key If inserting “by someone” after the verb makes sense, the voice is passive.

24. English for Careers: Business, Professional, and Technical, 10 th ed. Smith and Moore © 2010 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458. All Rights Reserved. 24 Active or passive? Antonio forgot to tune the piano. Active subject (Antonio) did the action (forgot) The piano wasn’t tuned. Passive piano wasn’t tuned “by someone”

25. English for Careers: Business, Professional, and Technical, 10 th ed. Smith and Moore © 2010 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458. All Rights Reserved. 25 Sentence fault #7— dangling verbals Don’t let your verbals dangle in public! Flying overhead, the guide pointed out the rare whooping cranes. (the guide was flying?) The guide pointed out the rare whooping cranes flying overhead.

26. English for Careers: Business, Professional, and Technical, 10 th ed. Smith and Moore © 2010 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458. All Rights Reserved. 26 Correct the dangling verbal Smothered in fudge, we ate the delicious sundaes. (we were smothered in fudge?) Smothered in fudge, the sundaes we ate were delicious.

27. English for Careers: Business, Professional, and Technical, 10 th ed. Smith and Moore © 2010 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ 07458. All Rights Reserved. 27 Checkpoint You now know what makes workplace writing work!